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Deep breathing is a simple technique that’s excellent for managing emotions. Not only is deep breathing effective, it’s also discreet and easy to use at any time or place.
Sit comfortably and place one hand on your abdomen. Breath in through your nose, deeply enough that the hand on your abdomen rises. Hold the air in your lungs, and then exhale slowly through your mouth, with your lips puckered as if you are blowing through a straw. The secret is to go slow: Time the inhalation (4s), pause (4s), and exhalation (6s). Practice for 3 to 5 minutes.
By tensing and relaxing the muscles throughout your body, you can achieve a powerful feeling of relaxation. Additionally, progressive muscle relaxation will help you spot anxiety by teaching you to recognize feelings of muscle tension.
Sit back or lie down in a comfortable position. For each area of the body listed below, you will tense your muscles tightly, but not to the point of strain. Hold the tension for 10 seconds, and pay close attention to how it feels. Then, release the tension, and notice how the feeling of relaxation differs from the feeling of tension.
| Feet | Curl your toes tightly into your feet, then release them. |
| Calves | Point or flex your feet, then let them relax. |
| Thighs | Squeeze your thighs together tightly, then let them relax. |
| Torso | Suck in your abdomen, then release the tension and let it fall. | Back | Squeeze your shoulder blades together, then release them. | Arms | Make fists and squeeze them toward your shoulders, then let them drop. | Hands | Make a fist by curling your fingers into your palm, then relax your fingers. | Face | Scrunch your facial features to the center of your face, then relax. | Full Body | Squeeze all muscles together, then release all tension. |
Anxiety can be magnified by irrational thoughts. For example, the thoughts that “something bad will happen” or “I will make a mistake” might lack evidence, but still have an impact on how you feel. By examining the evidence and challenging these thoughts, you can reduce anxiety.
Put thoughts on trial. Choose a thought that has contributed to your anxiety. Gather evidence in support of your thought (verifiable facts only), and against your thought. Compare the evidence and determine whether your thought is accurate or not.
Use Socratic questioning. Question the thoughts that contribute to your anxiety. Ask yourself:
“Is my thought based on facts or feelings?”
“How would my best friend see this situation?”
“How likely is it that my fear will come true?”
“What’s most likely to happen?”
“If my fear comes true, will it still matter in a week? A month? A year?”
Your thoughts have the power to change how you feel. If you think of something sad, it’s likely you’ll start to feel sad. The opposite is also true: When you think of something positive and calming, you feel relaxed. The imagery technique harnesses this power to reduce anxiety.
Think of a place that you find comforting. It could be a secluded beach, your bedroom, a quiet mountaintop, or even a loud concert. For 5 to 10 minutes, use all your senses to imagine this setting in great detail. Don’t just think fleetingly about this place–really imagine it.
Look all around to take in all your surroundings. Look for small details you would usually miss.
Think of how the air feels on your skin, and how your clothes feel on your body. Soak in all these sensations.
Listen closely to everything around you. Keep listening to see if you notice any distant sounds.
Take some time to appreciate the scents.
Savor all the tastes of the food or drink.
Recognize Your Anger Early
If you’re yelling, it’s probably too late. Learn the warning signs that you’re getting angry so you can change the situation quickly. Some common signs are feeling hot, raising voices, balling of fists, shaking, and arguing.
Take a Timeout
Temporarily leave the situation that is making you angry. If other people are involved, explain to them that you need a few minutes alone to calm down. Problems usually aren’t solved when one or more people are angry.
Deep Breathing
Take a minute to just breathe. Count your breaths: four seconds inhaling, four seconds holding your breath, and four seconds exhaling. Really keep track of time, or you might cheat yourself! The counting helps take your mind off the situation as well.
Exercise
Exercise serves as an emotional release. Chemicals released in your brain during the course of exercise create a sense of relaxation and happiness.
Express your Anger
Once you’ve calmed down, express your frustration. Try to be assertive, but not confrontational. Expressing your anger will help avoid the same problems in the future.
Think of the Consequences
What will be the outcome of your next anger-fueled action? Will arguing convince the other person that you’re right? Will you be happier after the fight?
Visualization
Imagine a relaxing experience. What do you see, smell, hear, feel, and taste? Maybe you’re on a beach with sand between your toes and waves crashing in the distance. Spend a few minutes imagining every detail of your relaxing scene.
Sometimes anger can affect what you say or do before you even recognize how you’re feeling. You may become so used to the feeling of anger that you don’t notice it, sort of like how you can hear the sound of an air condition, or the humming of a refrigerator, but block it from your mind.
Even if you aren’t aware of your anger, it influences how you behave. The first step to managing anger is learning to recognize your personal warning signs that will tip you off about how you’re feeling.
How do you react when you feel angry? Some of these warning signs might start when you are only a little irritated, and others might start when you are very angry.
Check off the warning signs that apply to you.
Trauma survivors may re-experience their trauma through thoughts, feelings, memories, and other means. Re-experiencing a trauma can be very distressing, and may trigger uncomfortable emotions such as fear, anger, or sadness.
Because reminders of a trauma can be so distressing, it is common for trauma survivors to use avoidance to control these reactions.
Negative thoughts or feelings may begin or worsen after experiencing a trauma. Some of these thoughts and feelings might not seem to relate directly to the trauma.
Reactivity, or a feeling of being “on edge”, may begin or worsen after experiencing a trauma. This category includes a broad range of physical and psychological symptoms.